No Sailing on Mother’s Day — Does That Still Make Sense?
Make no mistake about it: We loved our mother and think all mothers need to be celebrated on Mother’s Day. However, the world has changed, and we thought we’d check in on a Mother’s Day tradition to see if it still makes sense. Celebrating Mother’s Day, as such, still makes sense, but the day has always stood out in the YRA annual racing calendar because there are never any events scheduled for Mother’s Day. Is that too hot to touch? Should we carry on with that tradition without taking a periodic pregnant pause to give it some thought? We’re nervously reaching out to readers (and mostly sailing mothers) to see how they feel about having no sailing events scheduled on their special day.
One really lucky aspect of not having events on the sailing calendar was looking at what was coming up for this weekend’s sailing — Mother’s Day sure stood out. We assume that’s saved a few other sailors besides us. That little gem might easily get missed if it was surrounded by a bunch of races.
Given all the racing on the annual calendar, it is nice to take a break now and again, but is Mother’s Day the day? Since our February 1979 Women’s Issue, which celebrated many of the pioneering sailing women of the time, the world of sailing women has expanded dramatically, so there may be more than a few women wondering why they’re at a Mother’s Day brunch rather than out sailing.
Our mother had never sailed until she met Dad, but there was lots of sailing after that. Their honeymoon was a bareboat charter around Cape Cod in the early ’50s before they started a family and sailing became a family activity.
Maybe the Mother of All Mother’s Days hasn’t been invented yet, but ideas like this take a while to gestate before such an idea can be carried to term. Maybe the “no-sailing-events” is a tradition that will carry far into the future, but we thought it was a good time to check in and see if moms would rather be sailing on their special day.
The weather forecast for Sunday looks good, so it should be a pretty nice day for a … Mother’s Day. Regardless of how you decide to celebrate, we salute all mothers on Mother’s Day.
Ha! I can barely get committed crew (some of whom are mothers) to race on the Saturday of Mother’s Day weekend. Sunday would cause a mutiny!
What about women sailors who aren’t mothers? In my 70’s and still a boat owner, Mama and my mother-in-law, have sailed onto heavenly waters. Taking the boat out with my beloved sailing hubby any day feels special. Maybe we can create a new thing, water brought each of us into this world, so it should be honored as the great mother as well!
I am a ” Childless Cat Woman” and I have confidence that I sailed in vitro. I once saw my mother trapezing on my dad’s 110 in a dress up to the beach so she could go for a swim. Not everyone is a traditional ” mom “. Jocelyn Nash sure wasn’t either.
I’ll bite on this thought experiment because it’s one I’ve considered frequently. As someone who is involved in organizing regattas and spends hours evaluating the annual race schedule searching for days to fit more racing in, I understand why race organizers try to convince themselves that a Mother’s Day race might be a good idea. It’s hard not to plan a regatta on a late spring Sunday when the weather is likely to be beautiful. As a mom who sails a lot…. Mother’s Day still needs to be off limits for racing because many of the conditions that existed when Mother’s Day was created still exist and some other complexities have been added. Every racer has a mother in their life that they should be celebrating on Mother’s Day. Sure there are plenty of folks who are not immediately connected to motherhood or parenting currently, but mothers, for the most part, nurture all of society. By doing most of the raising of the next generation, as teachers, as care workers, as nurses and doctors as volunteers. Moms deserve one day at least where society nurtures them. If the racer in the family is not a mother, the nature of racers dictates that if there was a race on the schedule, inevitably the racers would find an excuse to prioritize racing and probably forget to call their mothers. Racing on Mother’s Day would distract from the collective gratitude we all should be showing to the mothers of our communities. If the racers’ partner is a mother of their combined children, chances are mom is not only working outside the home to help finance the sailing habit, but is also managing the children the entire year when the racer is off racing and deserves at least one weekend day off when they don’t have to be the primary parent, one day a year where they can relax and let the other parent fully take on the responsibilities and planning required for raising good humans. I think a lot of racers who are partners with the mother of their shared children already have to work hard find a good balance of racing and being present and committed partners and parents and would be in the doghouse big time if there were racing on Mother’s Day. Especially if the mother in the partnership is not also a racer.
If the racer in the family is a mom who races with their partner and/or separately, like me, then she probably had to step back from sailing while the children were little, and would have to miss out on racing on Mother’s Day as well, a recipe for resentment and feeling unappreciated. Also we have our own, probably non racing mothers that we need to celebrate and appreciate on Mother’s Day. Women have made gains towards parity from the not so distant days when we were barred from yacht club membership and when we needed husbands to co sign our credit cards and boat loans. But despite some progress, society still judges mothers harshly, and those who would choose racing on Mother’s Day over spending time with their kids would be seen by many as uncommitted mothers. Plus most of us really really love our children and don’t want to miss out on the one day a year when the family isn’t pulled in different directions due to extra curriculars and we all make a concerted effort to spend quality time together. Either way, holding races on Mother’s Day would put more burden back on the mothers in the racing community with very little positive trade off. Not to mention taking the yacht club staff and race volunteers required to run regattas away from their mothers on Mother’s Day. It’s already hard enough to get race committee volunteers the rest of the year, it’s basically a non starter on Mother’s Day. And running races costs money. I highly doubt a race organizer would be able to garner enough registrations to cover the cost. Racing on Mother’s Day is a net negative by a long shot… trust me, I’ve run the scenario. If you really need to be sailing on Mother’s Day, and the mothers in your life also love sailing, treat them to a beautiful brunch at the yacht club and then take them out for a lovely day sail on the most beautiful bay in the world. No racing on Mother’s Day is a tradition that should remain sacrosanct for both practical and sentimental reasons. And to all the Mothers who are part of the racing community, thank you for all you do to support this generation of racers and to raise the next generation! Our sport owes you a lot of gratitude. Happy Mother’s Day!